Also expect it even after you’ve been with him for 5yrs, living together, sucked his dick numerous times until it goes numb, given him sex everyday of every hour.
Dating an uneducated man
As always, here’s Madonna herself enlightening us on what compelled her to write this next article comparing – from a women perspective, of course – the dating scene in Puerto Rico and the US, and the differences between Puerto Rican men and American Guys: I’m currently not on the island and you know what that means…a new article!
It’s been forever since I’ve written for Clevered Fool.com… I will say though, I’ve seen some really crazy shit happening in Puerto Rico lately.
Recently, I was in Plaza Escorial (Editor’s Note: also known as, Cacolandia) and I helped catch a pathetic, but good looking and clean-cut thief, who was stealing a “Totto” (hilarious) fanny pack (even more hilarious! As a reward, Wal-Mart gave me a $50 gift certificate because they were shocked that I actually told them… Anyways, here’s a list of the dating differences between Puerto Rican Men & American Men… They have their own style, persona, and a swag that’s so different from the majority of the Puerto Rican men here – another reason why I need to move back, but not before I take advantage of the island’s stupidity to reach that top spot on the Forbes 400 List… Puerto Rican men do not – I repeat, DO NOT – keep their nails neat or trimmed.
Apparently, most people here in PR don’t say anything when they see shit like that going on… By the way, that last whole scenario on average lasts a solid 5 minutes, so you better make ‘em count, girls! It seems that somehow, someway, they always have that one long troll-nail on their hand.
Our newest girl columnist Madonna, is here once again to grace our procrastination endeavors with some of her patented efforts in the art of adding insult to injury towards the forsaken island, and crime capital of the world: Puerto Rico…
This time, she continues her exploration of the Puerto Rican culture, with another installment on the dating scene in Puerto Rico, and honors us with a rendering of the differences between Puerto Rican Men and American guys…
I have yet to meet a PR guy my age who doesn’t have at least 5 kids, a couple more in waiting, and 12 crazy baby-mamas as the cherry on top of their sundae!
Oh, and of course, paying endless child support – and being delinquent on them – is sort of a tribal ritual to be proud of for Puerto Rican men; I am so very sorry guys, but after that many kids and baby-mamas, your dick does us all a favor and it should just fall off, really – or better yet it should be ostracized from society!
After that many dips, the guy is tainted, so it’s extremely rare to find a guy with no baggage here.
As such, my piece of advice for you girls: Run a background check on them before you get serious — Just trust me on that one. All that romantic Spanish sweet-talking you do will automatically get a flood going in any woman’s panties – no matter the age.
But the reality is that while his car may be nice and neat, he probably still lives with mom and dad off of government coupons, and I assure you, his room will probably look like Jesus took his last holy crap in his hot mess of a room – You think I’m kidding… If you wait for the guy to open the door, he’ll ask whether you’re too handicapped to open your own door.